I’m not the first woman that will say this, and most probably also not the last: a woman does not ask for it if she dresses a certain way! If I show my cleavage, it doesn’t make me a kech and if I wear heals under a skirt, it is not a reason to grab my ass. If I wear make up, it doesn’t make me a whore and if I drink something in a bar, it is not an open invitation for assault.
I’d rather not do it, walking the streets alone. Usually I try to have an attitude. Eyes on infinity bit gruff, head hiding under my hood (winter), or behind sunglasses (summer) I walk my decisive walk. I wear my earbuds, but the music is low. Al of my senses are on radar mode. All of this is supposed to work as some kind of self protecting shield against the weirdos. You know, those men that shout that they know what to do to me, ask me where I am going, or even dare to touch me. I am not asking for it. Not by what I am wearing, not by the way I look, not by my feminine shapes. It is a persistent misunderstanding. Let me tell you why.
Let’s say you walk into a candy shop. You know, the ones where the candy is up for grabs in open boxes. Bright colors and fun shaped candy makes your mouth water. Is this shop asking for it, for you to take out a fistful of candy and put it in your mouth? Or will you, just like any other decent well-mannered person, full your bag and pay at the register?
Or suppose you have a great speedy ride. Let’s say an Audi TT Convertible. You park your car in front of the shop. The weather is nice, so you leave the hood down. After all, you’ll be back in a minute. When you come back, someone is sitting in your car. You were clearly asking for it, leaving it open like that. He just wanted to experience how it would be to take place behind the wheel of such a beautiful car. How fast would you drag him out of your car? How mad would you be?
Or, your neighbor is lighting his barbecue. The smell of his marinated ribs, juicy hamburgers and selfmade satay crawls over the fence. You decide to walk into his garden, uninvited, to take a bite of his burgers. How could you resist? Your neighbor was asking for it, by literally sending you smoke signals.
Strange, right? You get it, this is something you shouldn’t do, and probably wouldn’t. You don’t eat right out of the boxes at the candy shop, and no, you don’t touch an other men’s car, and you resist the urge to taste a burger uninvited. Let me be clear, that’s exactly how it is with beautiful women. You don’t touch the candy, you keep your hands off and you don’t taste it.
Don’t hot chicks like sex? Oh, yes we do! I love sex. But not just with just anyone. Not with the first weirdo that touches me unsolicited. Of course, we women enjoy hearing that we look good. But with respect. So do say “Gosh, you look good”, but without the “I’d know what to do with you”. Do say “what a nice sweater, it looks so good on you”, but without the “great tits”. Do say “you are beautiful”, but without “let’s fuck”.
Show her that you admire her, honor her, awe her and appreciate her. If that is mutual and she shows interest in you, start a conversation. Not about boobs. Not about fucking. Show interest. Ask questions. Dug deeper. And if she tells you she’s not interested, leave it at that. If need be, apologize for stealing her time. be a gentleman. Believe me. You will fuck more often!