Every once in a while, we receive a question in our mailbox that is worthy of being discussed in detail. This time, we were asked what exactly ‘kabazzah’ is and how to practise it.
Kabazzah is also known as pompoir, ‘playing the flute’, the Singaporean grip’, or ‘the Singaporean kiss’ and it is a technique in which the woman stimulates a penis using her pelvic muscles.
Pompoir is a sexual technique, originating in India, where the woman uses her vaginal muscles to stimulate a man’s penis. It is a form of tantric sex and both the man and the woman are not supposed to move. The woman uses her pubococcygeus muscle (also known as the PC muscle) to give pulsating squeezes to the erect penis that is inside her. The PC muscle is a hammock-like muscle that runs from the pubic bone to the tailbone and is part of the pelvic floor muscles. It surrounds the rectum, the urinary bladder opening and in women also the vagina. The muscle controls, for example, the urine outflow. You will recognise it by suddenly holding back your urine during urination. The muscle you then use is the PC muscle.
You can train the PC muscle by doing kegel exercises or by practising pumpoir.
Kabazzah comes from the Arabic language and translates as ‘holder’. It is a variation on the pompoir technique and comes from the tantra of South Asia. While pompoir mainly involves squeezing the penis, kabazzah uses the abdominal muscles in addition to the pelvic floor muscles. The contraction movement is then not only made by the PC muscle, but also by the uterus. In kabazzah too, the man is supposed to remain completely passive.
The man will experience this as ‘being milked by a vagina’. It is an extremely difficult technique to master and requires a lot of practice (but what man would mind that?). Geishas would sometimes have to train for years before they could master this technique.
Both kabazzah and pompoir seem to be completely focused on the male orgasm, but nothing could be further from the truth. Women who have stronger pelvic floor muscles are often better able to have a more intense orgasm and often also a multiple orgasm.
Milking and locking
It is obvious that you apply both techniques during sexual intercourse (penis in vagina). The best way to do this is to choose a position where the man approaches the woman from the front and preferably with the woman on top (the missionary position or the amazon position). The idea is not to make any in-and-out thrusting movements and the woman should not ‘ride’ during this technique either.
The ‘only’ thing the woman does is rhythmically contract the muscle group around the vagina. You can practice this with so-called cone exercises. In this way you train these muscles and make them stronger. You also learn to control the individual muscles and use them independently. By contracting and relaxing the muscles separately, you get the feeling of a wave motion.
This allows you to ‘milk’ the penis without making in-and-out movements.
If you like ‘edging’ (delaying orgasm as long as possible), you can also tighten the pelvic floor muscles to ‘lock’ the penis. Your grip is then so firm that moving is almost impossible.
- The history of the collar in BDSM - 8 December 2023
- CosmeTheocs – erotic story - 8 December 2023
- Male menopause (andropause) and its impact on sexuality - 1 December 2023