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Forced orgasm – this is how to do it

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Some people like to have a ‘forced’ orgasm. They might even prefer it above other forms of sex. But what is so good about it? And how can you do it (together with your partner)?

Power and control

With a ‘forced’ orgasm, your partner determines when you are allowed to cum and when not (yet). Forced orgasm is part of some form of powerplay. You temporarily give control over your body to your partner. He or she gets to postpone or provoke your orgasm. This can be extremely erotic.

Pain is pleasure

Restraining an orgasm until you get permission to cum, is a kind of pain. On the other side is getting orgasm after orgasm also a kind of pain. In both cases you combine sexual discharge with (light) pain of the friction of sensitive body parts. Sometimes, the pain comes from the rough hand or a strong vibrator. But it may well be that you have become sore and any touch is sensitive.

Orgasms are great

Almost everybody that is sexually active, enjoys orgasms (right?). People that enjoy forced (and multiple) orgasms take it to the next level. Muscles contract to the point where they start to hurt. Nerve endings have become so sensitive, they tingle. Sweat runs over you body and you are gasp for air. Does that appeal to you? Then a ‘forced’ orgasm might be something for you!

How to achieve a forced orgasm

Before we go into that:

  • We used the word ‘forced’ in between quotation marks for a reason. Sex without consent or against someone’s will is never – we repeat: never! – OK.
  • Agree to what you want and what you don’t want. It might be a good idea to agree on a safe word.
  • A ‘forced’ orgasm is not just for the dominant male that wants to play with a submissive woman. Human beings that have a penis can also be forced to orgasm.
  • The process and the time it takes can differ for everyone, no matter what gender. Even for the same person it may differ from time to time.
  • You will notice that practice makes perfect. After a while you will be able to go on longer. Don’t be disappointed if the first time is not such a big success.

Your partner may be able to orgasm just once at a time. Postponing an orgasm is a great way to built the tension and make the orgasm even more intense. Other people may be able to come multiple times in a row. The fun is not so much in the orgasm (that too, obviously), but mainly in the way it is achieved.

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Bondage and vibrators

When you look up ‘forced orgasm’ in Google, it is very likely that you will find pictures of kinksters that have tied someone up and that use a wand vibrator to their genitals. It is often a Europe Magic Wand (the European variant of the Hitachi). These wand vibrators are well known for their intense vibrations.

You don’t have to be an expert in tying or shibari. There are plenty of bondage materials for sale, such as tape or cuffs, to tie someone to the bed (or chair, or table, or … well, you get it, don’t you). Once you have restrained your partner, it is a great moment to grab your vibrator. You can tie the vibrator to your partner, or you can hold it against their genitals to gain more control over the pressure and the power.

And yes, also a person with a penis can be forced to orgasm in this way. Make him hard with the vibrator and increase pressure to your have milked him ’till the last drop. There are some great accessoires for sale for wand vibrators to stimulate penises. Because men can have multiple orgasms too, you know. You may have to take a brake between two orgasms, but it can be done. Even one forced orgasm can be great, if you postpone it until he begs for you to let him cum.

Edging and commandos

With edging the point is to bring your partner to the edge of orgasm, but not just over it. You bring your partner to the point when he or she almost cums, but then you stop and postpone it for a while. You can also have your partner masturbate and then sat ‘stop’ to prevent your partner from orgasm. The more often you do this, the more intense the actual orgasm (once granted) will be. But if your dominant determines how often it will happen before you are allowed to cum, you may never know if you will get to the edge, or over it …

In BDSM play, the submissive may have to beg for permission to cum. The dominant can deny it or allow it. Sometimes an audience is involved. At other times, begging might just lead to extra ‘punishment’. The greatest pleasure comes from the game of denying someone to orgasm. And if the orgasm is finally granted, the hand, or the vibrator, or tongue can go on even far after the orgasm has ended. The first orgasm is often very explosive, by the tension that was built, but by continuing to stimulate, this built up tension can lead to a second orgasm within short notice.

Forced orgasm and masturbation

A ‘forced orgasm’ doesn’t necessarily have to be induced by a partner. You can also do that to yourself. You can ‘force’ yourself to play. Try using edging and postponing your own orgasm. This is a perfect way to play with a partner on a distance, while your partner talks to you via WhatsApp, Skype oor telephone. Or your partner can watch while you postpone your orgasm, or until your partner allows you to cum.

After your first orgasm, you continue to masturbate (with hands or vibrator), even if it hurts. You will experience that different muscles in your body will tense when the orgasm starts to build again.

As soon as the pain does not outweigh the pleasure, it is time to stop. That may be after the second orgasm, or after the eighth. Stop as soon as you don’t enjoy the feeling. Relax. Take a bath, or take a nap.

Relinquish control over your orgasm can be done in different ways. From withholding orgasms, to forcing multiple orgasms. Sometimes that can be over the course of several days, for instance if you are not allowed to cum for days in a row, or to masturbate on set hours.

Even if you are alone, you can force yourself to postpone your orgasm or to force yourself to have multiple orgasms. Whatever it is, if it gives you pleasure, go for it!

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Marc van Lier
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Marc van Lier
As multi faceted as a Rubik's Cube. Wants to have a day off after every holliday. Has a bucket list that is smaller than his fucket list.
Marc van Lier
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