There comes a time in every relationship, or with every date, that you will get undressed for some serious hot sex. The well seasoned person will take out a condom without hesitation. But the less experienced dater may ask you if you perhaps have a condom at hand. And than there are the careless that just go right to their target and you might have to slow them down to ask them if they aren’t forgetting something.
Condoms are always a good idea, if you aren’t yet in a long term relationship with someone. They help you prevent unwanted pregnancies and can protect you against sexual transmitted diseases and infections. Still, condoms aren’t without risks. That’s why we sum up the 6 most common problems with condoms and we gve you some tips on how to deal with them.
It is kind of a thingy when you start dating: should you, or should you not take a condom with you? If you have one, you might give the signal that sex was all you where up for and that may not be the image you want. But if you haven’t got one on you, you might seem a little naive.
On top of that, some women still wrongly believe that it is a man’s duty to bring the rubber. He has the dick, so he better caries something to wrap it up with.
If you start dating, you look nice, there is a chance – no matter how small – that you meet someone to have sex with, dan you make sure you have condoms (plural) on you. Whether you’re a man or a woman. Basta!
If you do wind up in a situation where for one reason or another, you don’t have any condoms on you, but you do want to have sex, here’s some options:
- Go to the toilet in the nearest bar, hotel of gas station. Chances are the have a condom machine and you can still buy yourself a package.
- If not, go to plan B and use your hands. The chance you will get pregnant by fingering or a hand job is close to zero and, although chances are small, it almost out of the question that you get an STD from manual sex.
You may of course also consider having unprotected sex. Maybe you are on the pil and your bed partner looks healthy. But do realize that most STDs are invisible and you can also get an STD from oral sex. Are you sure you want to run the risk of getting herpes or HIV from this date?
As a general rule, the shelf life of condoms is five years from production date. Everyone carrying a condom that has expired, must have had protected sex longer than five years ago. Whatever reason the owner of said condom has, there is no excuse.
On each condom the expiration date (EXP) is printed. An expiration date is not the same as the best-before date, like you have it on a carton of milk, for example. A best-before date is a guarantee that the product can be used up to that date. After that date, it can still be used, but there is a chance that it isn’t fresh anymore. An expiration date shows when it is unsafe to use the product. After the date has expired, you must throw the product away.
So, always check the EXP date. If you have forgotten to do so, you can sometimes just feel that the condom is past its expiration. The rubber may feel dry, or just weird and sticky and maybe even a little fragile. The chance that a dried out condom breaks is huge. So, make sure you check you have condoms on you before you go on a date and check if those condoms are still way before the expiration date.
Now the expiration date doesn’t say all. Condoms that have been stored too cold (in the fridge or in the dashboard of a car in winter) or too hot (in the sun, or in the dashboard of your car in summer) can go to waste. That’s why you better not get your condoms from a machine that is outside in the sun or the freezing cold.
A common mistake is that men use a condom that just doesn’t fit. Unlike popular belief, condoms aren’t for every size. A condom that is too small kan rupture and one that is too large can slide off. Most condoms are made for the average penis size. That is why it is important to know what the size of your penis actually is. Your choice of condoms, depends less on the length but more of the girth. Most condoms show their ‘nominal size’ (which is the diameter when is is flat on the table). Most condoms have a nominal size of between 52 and 56 mm. Tighter condoms are between 46 and 49 mm and larger ones start from 57 mm. There are also brands that have their own condom size indicator, which makes it easier to determine your size.
When you are a woman and you carry condoms on you, just take condoms of the average size. Should your friend have an exceptional penis size than you A) have to trust that he brings his own, or B) you have to go to alternative ways of having sex (like manual).
It seems fun, a condom with strange shapes and colors, ridges and protrusions. But a vagina is not designed for penetration by a cactus or a rabbit with whiskers and big ears. Also, most fun condoms do not protect against unwanted pregnancy or STDs. There just there for the fun.
So, no, a fun condom isn’t funny (unless it is a present and you are sure the one you’re giving it to will not try to use it), and no, fun condoms are not pleasant for the receiving party, and no not all fun condoms are safe.
Do yourself a favor: Just buy yourself some reliable condoms.
There are three reasons why condoms slide off:
- The condom wasn’t properly put on. If you don’t roll it off completely, there is a chance it will slide off. The movements that you make could make the condom roll back up.
- You didn’t hold the condom when you pulled back. After an orgasm, a man’s penis will become flaccid quite quickly. If you wait too long, the condom will no longer be tight around the penis. If you pull back without holding the condom, it will inevitably slide off.
- The condom was too big to begin with. Next time, buy one that fits you (see above).
Whenever a condom has slipped off, there is a chance that sperm leaked into the vagina, anus or mouth. When sperm could have entered the vagina and you are not using any other contraceptive (like the pil) there is a chance of pregnancy. Go to your pharmacist (within 48 hours) to get a morning after pil. If you are not sure your partner was free of STDs, get yourself tested.
Condoms that are used correctly hardly ever break. When condoms are tested in a lab, less than 10 in 1000 condoms (less than 1%) break. Unfortunately, sex people have is not comparable to those lab environments. Condoms tear for many different reasons: it was too small, there was air in the reservoir, it was used too long, there was not enough lube, two condoms were used on top of each other, the wrong lube was used (silicone or oil based in stead of water based), the package was opened incorrectly, it was passed its expiration date, the condom was stretched in stead of rolled off, the reservoir was pulled over the glans, … Most issues with ruptures are due to incorrect use and not by manufacturing defects.
To prevent rupture it is really important to use condoms in the proper way. Make sure you have enough space on top (squeeze the reservoir between thumb and index finger, before you place it on the glans and roll it off). Never stretch or blow up the condom. Always take a new one if you have and never r. If you have had sex with a condom for longer than 10-15 minutes, change it for a new one. Apply some water based lube every now and then.
The risks for a ruptured condom are the same as with one that slid off.
- Make sure you carry enough condoms with you. Not just one, but a couple, in case something goes wrong, or in case you wind up getting multiple rounds of sex. Beter one too many than one short.
- Keep condoms properly (not too hot or too cold).
- When in doubt (for example when the packaging is punctured, or when the condom doesn’t feel right): throw it away and take a new one.
- Use water based lube.
- If you know you have an exceptional size (either larger or smaller than average) buy the correct size.